Me, the Enthusiastic Mom

20150219_085906-1Kestrel in my handMe 290613 3Heila 12 2013

My name is Heila. I am 55 (born 1961), divorced (and struggling to make ends meet), and mother of a 26-year-old son diagnosed with schizo-OCD, or schizophrenia and OCD, to go by the DSM (Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders) classification that does not include the term schizo-OCD. His coping and very special attitude in regard to his illness, the history of his condition and the extremely tough times we have gone through and emerged from, strengthened and life-embracing, inspired me to beginย this blog.

My parents are divorced (it runs in the family…), my father lives in West Africa and my mom and younger sister are at home in Germany. Eight years of my childhood I spent in Africa with my family. For the past 30 years I have been living in Israel. I speak German, English, Hebrew and French (the latter not too well). I love birds, cats – especially our cat, animals altogether, nature, biology, psychology, learning, sleeping, swimming, being cooked for, being left in peace (not always…), my bicycle, the sun, the sea and the desert.

My posts are about the content ofย my life: Mental health, my son, Israel, movies & books I enjoyed (or not), and thoughts.

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39 Comments

  1. Hi there,

    I’m doing a serial for my blog at mollieplayer.com called My Byron Katie Detox: One Year of Questioning Everything I Believe. Are you open to guest posts on your site and if so, is a personal story about The Work something you’d consider?

    Thanks so much for letting me know either way.

    Mollie
    mollieplayer.com

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  2. I find your approach to life inspirational. I admire the combination of toughness and love. You sound like a great mom. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your son. I know not everyone has a faith but it works for me and I hope you don’t mind me wishing you both everything you wish for yourselves.

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      1. You are very kind but there is only one wonderful person around here and it’s not me. Such courage, determination and love deserves to be rewarded and I believe it will be. I shall follow your journey because I want to be there when it happens for you.

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  3. You dropped a note on my About page. I wanted to discuss some deep level ideas. I read once of a hypnosis case history where scientists were able to get patients to a deep level of mind where there is no ego. To me understanding how the Mind works is religion. I define God as my mind at its deepest level. But I share that same deep level of mind with others. That Shared Level of Being could be called God or Spirit.

    I talked to 2 babies before they were born. They wanted me to tell their mothers that they were going to be born. They had to be born despite their mother’s resistance. One woman was a Jewish medical student. Babies follow mothers around for two years before being born.

    I have never had the problems your son experienced. I did have a lot of pain in my childhood and was extremely isolated. That did distance me from others.

    I doubt that hypnosis will help your son because we must have a developed ego before we can overcome it.

    You had an interesting interpretation of the word Thanks. I see how you came to that conclusion. You are a mother and a woman so you are owed Appreciation. But your ex-husband does not Appreciate you. And I am not sure if your son can Appreciate you. But maybe he can touch you which is a form of thanks.

    I have a blog where I have written a few articles about Women and other important subjects. I did write a few fiction pieces which I called Transformative Romances. Most women like Appreciation Day because it is about an ideal relationship where men properly appreciate their wives. Three Weeks is for younger unmarried women.
    http://youarereality.wordpress.com/2012/06/18/appreciation-day/

    If Bill Gates is in the top 0.00001% in wealth, you are in the top of 0.00001% of those who have suffered through the extreme pain of their child’s suffering. I will pray for you and your son. I have been able from time to help others through prayer. I did go through a dry spell in terms of healing but am getting back to healing again.

    I do appreciate what you have done. Your life is an example to parents all over the world.

    Thanks.

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    1. Thank you for your in-depth comment. What do you mean by: “Babies follow mothers around for two years before being born.”? Please excuse if I don’t reply in detail right now, I am simply dead tired and have to go get some sleep. See you around and thanks so much for your encouraging words. Heila

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  4. Eine ganz interessante “um”…ich lernte Deutsche als ich in der Schweiz gewohnt habe, sehr lange vor…ich vergesse viele! (ich weiss!) aber mag es zu ueben.

    You seem a really cool person. I love your face! Also, that falcon is great!! Are you a falconer…?

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    1. Hallo Karen,

      wie schรถn, Sie sprechen/Du sprichst Deutsch.
      Vielen Dank fรผr das Kompliment!!
      No, I’m not a falconer, I just love birds. ๐Ÿ™‚

      You seem like a very original person yourself, with so much imagination!
      Thanks for visiting and following.
      I just Liked your FB page ๐Ÿ˜‰

      Heila

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      1. I just surfed. I see you have a profile page, and not a commercial one–that’s what I meant. I wanted to share support for you. ๐Ÿ™‚ I have followed, you though–and look forward to peeking atcher posts!!

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  5. Don’t worry I was told few times in the past that I AM CRAZY ALSO .. ๐Ÿ˜€

    As they say in our modern Hebrew, MA SHE BA, BARUCH ABA ๐Ÿ˜‰

    I don’t believe in diagnoses at random by any expert Shrink/s, of any form/s of mental illness, I.D.D., etc….One either develop the symptoms between 12 and 25 years or nothing..The problem/s most have is in theirs mind, or they are simply PSYCHOPATHS by nature. http://paulcalmanovici.tripod.com/someonlineinformation/id1.html

    The link above is of one of my old sites, yet still has good info and what I believe …Anyway, my opinion/s.
    At 62 y.o. soon to be before Christmas, I think I prove them all WRONG. ..LOL
    Lived in Israel also, ( Kibbutz Beyt Alfa ๐Ÿ˜€ ), have been in I.A.F for 10 years, fighter pilot and in 1973 Yom Kippur war.
    Has been a pleasure to meet an ISRAELI after 33 years…. ๐Ÿ˜€

    Shalom havera. ๐Ÿ˜€

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    1. Shalom gam lecha chaver.

      What caught my attention and got me curious about you and your blog was your nose-picking Ovadia Yosef gravatar together with the “Old Fart”, LOL!!
      (BTW, what does AKKA with 2 Ks stand for?)

      Psychiatry and mental health are complex fields with lots of grey areas and diagnosing mental illnesses/disorders is challenging. As far as my son is concerned, there was nothing random about his diagnosis. It took quite some time to be worked up and involved his active help and it is well-established and definite. The diagnosis was followed by the trial and error phase of finding the suitable medication and dose.
      And yes, exactly, the problems are in the mind=brain โ€ฆ
      And ” simply PSYCHOPATHS” is toooo simple ๐Ÿ™‚
      I’ll have a look at your link, thanks.

      10 years IAF โ€“ marshim!

      I also love my bicycle: https://heilablog.com/2013/07/05/i-see-things-that-you-dont-see/

      See you around.
      Heila

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      1. Tuda ๐Ÿ˜€ …Yes indeed, will see more of each others around if you dare …LOL ๐Ÿ˜‰
        OVADIA YOSEF ?? = Harra TO ME …Forgive me, sorry , but NO… That’s for TEASING …:D
        As for “AKKA”, mean ANY BE YAMIM ๐Ÿ˜‰ = BEST …LOL

        Pleasure to have meet you …SHALOM GAM KEN. ๐Ÿ˜€

        Paul or PESAH

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    1. Thanks for getting back to me Tony.
      I’m not that much on Twitter yet. Somehow still didn’t get the hang of it. I am following a few people or media that are of interest to me. See you there.

      Best,
      Heila

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      1. It took me a while to get used to what it was all about and how to use it meaningfully.
        Used well it can be a source of great information and understanding other people views.
        Alternatively, you get to find out what people you hardly know had for their breakfast or what their cat did last night…!

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  6. after my various hospital visits and all the pain my family went through, it made my relationship with my mother very strong. distance had grown between the two of us, so for me, the bright side of all of this was the feeling that i had my mother again. it is a very strong love.

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