This Hibiscus flower looked right into my face when I came home today. How could I not smile back!
I, the hyper-energetic Gemini, am exhausted.
I really don’t expect life to be a walk in the park, but fuck, I do long for some peace of mind once in a while! I want to lay (lie) back, read, daydream, go swimming in the desert (see photo), enjoy delicious cuisine without having to cook (I HATE cooking but I LOVE eating…) or clean up … and take a break from the stress of walking on a tightrope just to survive, not for the fun of it.
My son’s psychotic & obsessive compulsions are getting worse by the day. I don’t have the patience to elaborate on how that affects our everyday life. I’ll just say this much: The crazy bastard in D.’s brain is turning my wonderful and so intelligent, good-natured and sensitive son once again into a helpless, panic-ridden and even aggressive bundle of nerves, obsessed with controlling everything while completely losing control.
I have to keep my cool. Next week another meeting with his psychiatrist. And my therapy group tomorrow morning, which I’m really looking forward to. And the sun will probably shine. So things could be worse… And they will get better. Because we are working on it.